chaoticlootral | horny bois on the loose

[We're hugging now! Too bad!]

I won't. I thought what he did sucked. You can still say, hey, I didn't fucking do it. It's true whether or not you think your friend did it.

What the fuck, what's happening, why are you squeezing me with your body?

[oh god what does he do with his arms]

It's a hug, and you need it. You're worrying too much. I'm not going to let you down.

[Gently rubbing his back.]

[This is simultaneously the worst thing that's ever happened to him and kind of nice. Magnus gives good hugs? It's one of his skills. Leave him alone. Awkwardly patting him on the back.]

Okay, okay, I believe you! And I'm not worrying, I'm far, far, too cool for that.

Whatever you say!

[Letting him go. Unless he tries to continue the hug, the way he clearly wants to.]

So, that was a big fucking mess, huh?

[Maybe holding on for like. Just a second. Don't judge him, it's just a good hug, and he can't really remember that ever happening before. I mean, sure, Magnus has given hugs to huge amounts of protest, and once Merle fell asleep on him, but Taako's thinks he's not much one for physical affection, and can't really be the one to admit he might be okay with it in times of true distress.]

Yep. About covers it.

[Okay. Giving him that extra two seconds.]

We were pretty close to getting it wrong! Oh, well.

[Cool okay, once he extracts himself, then just trying to fix his clothes to pretend that never happened, so he never has to talk about it again. Rolling that one around in his head for a minute, trying to decide if he'd actually feel all that guilty if they'd gotten the wrong guy.]

Well, they weren't making it easy to defend them.

[ . . . ]

We're going to fuck up eventually.

Yeah, of course we are.

[After a second, since this is a little dark.]

But it's hard to feel that much about it, you know? We need to stop the reapers, and I want to save as many as we can, but in the long run - it's just, a couple people who already died versus the Hunger.

[Thank god Magnus gets it? He feels a little guiltier about it, even though he doesn't want to. He feels guilter about a lot of things than he wants to. He feels guilty about Wonderland, and he still hit the forsake button. He feels guilty about Phandolin, and he still doesn't take responsibility. He feels guilty about running from forty deaths, but he still ran. He feels guilty about remembering he helped start a war, and hasn't mentioned it. One death, that's really just a vote - one fortieth of a whole - doesn't really seem to add to his count. He doesn't know how to feel about that. So he chooses to feel nothing.]

I know what you mean, my man, I know what you mean.

[He feels a little guilty for being glad he didn't have to die alone.]

I'm not gonna die here.

[The implication being: no matter what.]

No, you're not.

[Fiercely - he's not going to let Taako die here, either. Magnus doesn't spend that much time feeling guilty about things that have already happened, that he can't change, but he still gets emotional about people and things he still has control over. But that emotion is just emotion - none of these people matter the way Taako matters. Taako is his family. He might get caught up in the moment trying to save someone else, but it's Taako he needs to think about first.]

We're going home. And we gotta reverse your entry fee, too.

[Taako agrees entirely that none of these people matter the way Taako matters. And I guess Magnus. :/ He'd like to believe that straight up none of these people matter at all, point blank, but he's not quite that dead inside, as much as he wants to be. Pulling the same confused expression he does every time the subject of his entry fee comes up, but forgetting about it again just as quickly.]

If I can't remember it, then it's not hurting me. [Shrug.] Who gives a shit?

[That is blatantly horseshit, and even Taako knows it, but he's already admitted to having one (1) emotion today, he cant deal with two.]

Edited 2018-03-18 15:30 (UTC)

I do? [But yeah, he gets that it's probably not fair to make Taako worry about his entry fee when there's no way for him to understand it. It's just that - it's bad. It's so unfair. Now that he remembers Lup, the idea of taking Lup away from Taako just isn't okay. He's angry at Lucretia for it, and he's angry at this game that he can't tell Taako that.]

I'm not crazy on losing my entry fee, either. If it's that whole, protection thing. I mean, we're going home to fight a huge maybe unwinnable fight. I don't wanna just be stuck on the sidelines, useless, y'know?

There's probably a way to win it back. They wouldn't take shit if they weren't going to hold it over our heads.

[Though, the price for it is going to be awful. And he can guess what it probably is.]

. . . Would suck if we managed to make it back only to just die again.

The way I'm thinking about it now is, I don't want to play their game. I'll go along with it, but I'm not playing, I'm wrecking their shit at the first, you know, souffle opportunity. But maybe there's going to be a time when we have to do what they want, and kill people. I don't like that, but if we had to.

[He doesn't have much of an answer to that. Thinking about it for a second, before deciding if he's going to continue.]

The thing is, usually, if we died, we'd just jump ship to another plane. But we can't this time - we've got too many people we couldn't take with us. Ango, Carey, Killian, hell, Merle has a family. But also, me? I can't jump ship again. I won't. This is the plane that had Julia.

Sauté. But I see your point, homie. Don't really see much of a point in making a stand on morality on this one - if it comes down to it.

[Just pausing when Magnus mentions the whole Dead Wife thing, but mostly his thoughts are on the people he actually knows. Angus and Carey and Killian and Merle's surprise family. There's a selfish little part of him that wants to say that's insane, that a measured retreat to save your own skin isn't a bad thing, but he knows he's outvoted on this one. Both by the others and his own, disgusting and disobedient as it is, conscious. There's no running for him if the others choose to stay.
It's all of them or none of them. ]

. . . Right. I mean, cart before the, y'know, horse here. Have to survive this before we start making plans to dramatically die yet again, or it'll start getting a bit old. Wearing out our brand.

I know, I know. We gotta go back and win. But if I did get killed in the big fight, and we won anyway, I don't need anyone to try and fix it.

[That's the point - Taako said it would suck to go home just to die right away, but that's what he expects will happen to him. As long as he's done his job, and kept his friends safe, that's okay.]

Well, a personal request, since I don't ask much of you, ever, [LOL] just maybe try a little harder not to die? Not saying, uh, slack on your job or anything, but, you know. If you wanted to stick around.

Yeah, okay. I'll give it a shot.

[He says it kind of like they're joking around, but he knows Taako isn't joking, and he isn't, either. He can't say no when he knows that's what his friends want.]

horny bois on the loose

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject